A young and pretty lady posted this on a
popular forum:
Title: What should I do to marry a rich
guy?

I’m going to be honest of what I’m going
to say here. I’m 25 this year. I’m very
pretty, have style and good taste. I wish
to marry a guy with $500k annual salary
or above. You might say that I’m greedy,
but an annual salary of $1M is
considered only as middle class in New
York My requirement is not high. Is
there anyone in this forum who has an
income of $500k annual salary? Are you
all married? I wanted to ask: what
should I do to marry rich persons like
you? Among those I’ve dated, the richest
is $250k annual income, and it seems
that this is my upper limit. If someone is
going to move into high cost residential
area on the west of New York city garden
(? ), $250k annual income is not enough.

I’m here humbly to ask a few questions:
1) Where do most rich bachelors hang
out? (Please list down the names and
addresses of bars, restaurant, gym) 2)
Which age group should I target? 3) Why
most wives of the riches is only average-
looking? I’ve met a few girls who doesn’t
have looks & are not interesting, but they
are able to marry rich guys 4) How do
you decide who can be your wife, & who
can only be your girlfriend? (my target
now is to get married)
Ms. Pretty


———————————————————————————

Awesome reply:
Dear Ms. Pretty,
I have read your post with great interest.
Guess there are lots of girls out there who
have similar questions like yours. Please
allow me to analyse your situation as a
professional investor. My annual income
is more than $500k, which meets your
requirement, so I hope everyone believes
that I’m not wasting time here. From the
standpoint of a business person, it is a
bad decision to marry you. The answer is
very simple, so let me explain. Put the
details aside, what you’re trying to do is
an exchange of “beauty” and “money”:
Person A provides beauty, and Person B
pays for it, fair and square. However,
there’s a deadly problem here, your
beauty will fade, but my money will not
be gone without any good reason. The
fact is, my income might increase from
year to year, but you can’t be prettier
year after year. Hence from the
viewpoint of economics, I am an
appreciation asset, and you are a
depreciation asset. It’s not just normal
depreciation, but exponential
depreciation. If that is your only asset,
your value will be much worried 10
years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every
trading has a position, dating with you is
also a “trading position”. If the trade
value dropped we will sell it and it is not
a good idea to keep it for long term –
same goes with the marriage that you
wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but
in order to make a wiser decision any
assets with great depreciation value will
be sold or “leased”. Anyone with over
$500k annual income is not a fool; we
would only date you, but will not marry
you. I would advice that you forget
looking for any clues to marry a rich
guy. And by the way, you could make
yourself to become a rich person with
$500k annual income.. This has better
chance than finding a rich fool.
Hope this reply helps. If you are
interested in “leasing” services, do
contact me…
signed,
CEO J.P. Morgan